1:12am: That's just how i roll, and this dress she is wearing is dirty and needs to get pulled over her head.
He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
I used to practice getting hit by cars.
Shaving your vagina at 8 months pregnant is not an easy chore.
he just asked me to email him a handle of captain morgans...how sober do you think he is?
Chelsea handler, $19 million - Forbes women top 100. Seriously she shaped her career around her love of vodka. HERO.
they pretty much knew i was there to get drunk and fuck their daughter
Somewhere in the night I send my Dad a text stating "YOU failed as a parent"
Hope you had your fill for the summer my friend, because all the cleavage has been put away for the winter. Fear not; it blooms again in May.
I just got a lap dance from a sexy cop in return for giving him his sunglasses back. I think this is going to be the beginning of a really great friendship
I just gave them my two week notice. Now is the perfect time to fuck my boss's son
TJ is going to paint me in a Patriots Jersey he can paint you in an eagle jersey. Did this last year and got so much dick.
I can't talk, I can't walk, I think I'm twitching and I'm not even sure if I'm typing this. Help
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