Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
Well the light went out so I was throwing up by candle light. Strange moment in my life.
I love my penis, it thinks for me sometimes
We left around 4 AM after the stripper showed no mercy and dropped into a split on Matt's nose. Massive nosebleed.
Oh shit. Easter I forgot. Maybe we should leave the illegal stuff for when Jesus is less present.
The best part is when you puked in your slurpree and the 7 eleven guy still made you pay for it
She was humming during sex. After I asked her why, she said it was her sex theme music
Being home sucks. I haven't drank in like a week. Or smoked cigs. Or done drugs. Or had sex. My body is shutting down.
Omg. It's like you're one of those deprived kids living in a third world country. We need to save you.
I am playing a little game I like to call "How Quickly Can I Infuse This Vodka Into My Bloodstream Without the Use of an IV"
People were running around punching out the ceiling tiles Super Mario style.
He's like a unicorn and I just wanna domesticate him
I repeat do not go to a jail visit drunk, those stools are easy to fall off.
That is priceless. You walk into her house, fuck her husband and demand Chinese food. Your an inspiration to us all.
I'm in love. Her name is Jamie. She's beautiful. She punched me in the face.
I think I recall josh coming in to the room to tuck us in and give us a few condoms and I threw them back all furious and told him 'we don't use those.' Oh god
Randomize