i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
she's like "i'm so proud of u" ... and then i threw up on myself
Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
It was like doing yoga with his dick in me
Aparently his snake got loose in the middle of the night. Not a sex joke, he has a fucking snake
I just threw up in a patch of wild flowers on the side of the road. I never knew rock bottom was so beautiful.
Apparently she buried shit in the snow back in January and now that it's melted I found a flip flop, 4 spoons, a bottle of smirnoff, and 14 different candy bars
when he was about to finish he told me to avert my eyes and keep my lady parts away. chivalry isnt dead.
We just took back to back grav bong hits and are playing battleship. She guessed Z - 12 so weve switched board games.
Someone wrote "gnarballz" on my fridge in black marker. I'm pissed, but more concerned I slept with the one who did it
I've realized that I'm going to have to wake and bake every morning to make it through the summer without killing someone. This is ridiculous.
ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL
You should make us a hot pocket to split while I go throw up.
The guy I hooked up with last night left me alone with his dog AND IT JUST SHIT ON THE FLOOR. WHAT DO I DO
I'm glad I date someone who likes the simple things. Sex, kittens, and McDonald's.
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