So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
he told me he once ran a blackmarket liquor store out of his house. thats all it took for me to go home with him
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
Does the phrase 'traumatizing near-threesome' mean anything to you.
just had to sit in the middle of an aisle in stop and shop because we're too hungover and needed to take a break.
I posted my balls on ericas instagram. It got 17 likes.
I hope my orgasm sounds aren't secretly that bad and no one tells me
How does this dude know what a dying walrus sounds like? That's the real question
I once puked on the side of the hwy driving home and it somehow made me feel more Canadian. So don't rule it out
Maybe the problem is guy has to ask his wife if he can go out to lunch with his girlfriend for an hour...
I'm going to be drunk and braless all weekend. Let the festivities begin!
What happened?
New Orleans
Every time
you left your anal beads in the dishwasher
Have you ever drank bourbon in your underwear while wearing a Santa hat and reflecting on the decisions of your life? Asking for a friend.
There might be a dead possum in your bed, your roomate is extremely distressed!
Getting a lap dance from a girl you went to high school with really isn't as awkward as you'd think
And she called me out by name, nothing could have made it more awkward but it ended up not being that bad
Randomize
