the thought of Anne Coulter teabagging Dick Cheney kills me everytime.
could you grab mr moo while you're at his apt?
you brought your stuffed animal to a booty call?
Stop it. You sound like you're giving birth.
Katie is reenacting me jizzing in her eye via emoticons...
You were dancing on the bar and fell off into the arms of the hot bartender. It was like a fairy tale, with more alcohol.
How many times a week can a couple have a threesome with the same guy before it becomes some sort of 3-way relationship?
I am dressing up to go buy weed. I need to get out more.
Just puked up hair, tacos and vodka. Hello Memorial Day weekend.
Noooo. I told you she WAS a cancer. Not that she HAS cancer. This was the one time being a doctor didnt get you laid you alcoholic bastard
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
He made me cum 7 times AND I nearly drowned him during that 69 in the back of a ford focus. Yeah I should get my gynocologist.
the amount of chicks and firearms here is unnerving. this will end awesomely or at the morgue.
I have what looks like a rubber stamp mark on my cock from last night that says "Magic Marla Approved" Do we know a Marla?
I think we need to stage a munchie intervention for Ben. I just watched him use a tortilla as a potholder to dump water out of his ramen.
Remember the time you puked your contact lens out?
Randomize
