I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
I seriously wish I was FB friends with her
Whoever had sex in my bed during the party last night left a glow in the dark condom on my floor. I'm not even mad anymore, I just want to know who it is so they can tell me where to get one.
i literally paused in the middle of it, turned on my light, pointed to the picture netxt to my bed and go "you hooked up with my roommate too!!! AWWW!" he was so weirded out. i don't think he understands the relationship we have..we share..
Fuck him for salsa, please. I heard its a good recipe.
You did a line of free coke with an obese Slovenian unlicensed cab driver in the toilets of the most questionable strip club in the country. New low man.
When you put it like that, I'm inclined to agree.
6 beers and it feels like I've been drinking water... Daiquiri time
oh, so if i go friday and she's there, you are going to be my sponsor for not banging the crazy chick
No one is allowed to go to bed until all bottles are finished, I don't want to feel my face tongiht. Do you understand?
Side note. I love it when I think I've sobered up and then I get a second wind of drunk
he went to the bathroom at 5am only to come back and squeeze my boob before going back to sleep
Is it tacky to frame a negative pregnancy test?
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST.
I impressed him by taking off my panties without removing my pants.
Dude did you see that video of yourself crying while bathing in vodka on YouTube?
Randomize
