me texting you is like we have secret walkie talkies.
that would combine my 3 fave things. christmas funfetti and paul simon
A horse told me not to drive home last night. I think there was a cop on top of it.
She. Own s my pussycat. Roxk it like. The sun hitting the horizon
In other more interesting news I'm going to arrange a surprise orgy. You in?
somehow this went from sexting to explaining my eating disorder.
Did we seriously just get into a fist fight over kit kats?
Question. There's no better feeling than clean shaven balls. Do girls get that too?
I stole a tiki torch last night and just returned it. Things have been better.
I think his dick was bigger than his dog
IDK MAYBE BC I WOKE UP IN AN AIRPORT WITH A ONE WAY TICKET TO LONDON
I don't have any soul left to be crushed.
he told me that I'm basically going to be the mom of the house when they move in...i like to see it as being a MILF without the responsibility of real children
Something like, "Merry Christmas. I hope Santa shits in your mouth."?
I mean, I was going to use them for a beading project, but I guess I could take one and let you bat my dick around like a cat toy.
Randomize
