Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
When we were fucking, you could hear the beer sloshing around in my stomach
watching E! true Hollywood story: curse of the lottery.. i'd probably spend all my money on blow and airplanes too..
Can we just schedule bi-weekly fucks and bypass all the bullshit?
Just found out for my occult lit class (history of cults) final project is making a spellbook. Hello last term of college.
She got all mad because she said it was "unprofessional" to tell my manager to go fist herself.
nothing says new school year like ambulances and police road blocks.
facebook friend requested him the morning after while he was still asleep in my bed, a whole new level of creeper even for me
my mom just cut me up lemons and limes so i would have some vitamins with my tequlia
I'm sorry. I think I have multiple personalities. Or it was the acid. Either way. I'm sorry.
I don't care how many kiddie pools are in our house. One is too many.
i think the penis that was inside of me changed my life
Yea there's blood all over the porch but we wont have to buy alcohol for the rest of the week
I just don't know the best way to tell him I think I saw him in a porn. I mean I got off to it, isn't there some level of awkwardness there?
It's 4 am here and I just vomited myself awake....Not rising OR shining any time soon
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