did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
Totally saw a hot amputee. I think this is called character growth.
I need like a "Cookong High for Idiots" book. Or a car.
I think condoms have that nasty latex smell to remind you in the morning of how gross you are.
Sharpest. Poop. Ever.
I think this baby is eyeing my beer
gpnpr hd vmdd nm the ggrl whm was mn my lar
I need you to use more vowels.
okay. so this hammed chick got arrested and she keeps trying to make out with the cop. i like her style.
I have invented a new sport: freshman-watching. I'm sitting on our porch literally dying watching the freshmen run around trying to find parties
I just handed the barista at Starbucks a panty liner instead of my card....maybe I should upgrade this Tall to a Venti...
nothing like a cross blunt to celebrate the birth of our savior
It is very possible that having sex with you just now just got me into Yale
We both got free alcohol and got laid by foreign men last night.
I'm not going out again for the rest of my life. I can't top this.
Remind me in the morning that I've now seen a guy do crack. That actually happened. I'm at the wrong party.
I know this is a weird question but we both had pants on when my mom woke us up last night right?
Randomize
