There's a girl at 7-11 apologizing for her behavior and asking if she can get her shoes back.
You were running around with scissors offering people free haircuts.
Maybe I need a light up heart over my vagina like Christina aguilera to get the point across
Am i fat?
Well i wouldnt let you on top
I know it sounds like a good idea, but doing Spanish homework at a bar just because the owners are Mexican and they give us margaritas really wasn't the best decision.
So, do you think I should wash the ashes off of my forehead before going to the strip club?
On a scale of one to america, how free are you this weekend?
You need 4-7 business day to recover from a fingering like that.
Why was there a 1000 piece puzzle covered in hot sauce being cooked in the microwave?
Note to self: semen does not count as food to take medicine with
He doesn't care. He wouldn't care if my vag grew arms and smacked him in the face.
Well I think won that argument, as the cops were leaving, they offered me a ride to the airport
they set my background as his mugshot to remind me "having a big penis won't be a valid excuse in a court room."
I told him about the time I blacked out and shit myself and he still wanted to have sex with me that night. Feeling pretty optimistic about where this fling is going.
No I dont want him to bring his twin brother, cause then ill have to entertain him with my vagina
Randomize
