names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
You coming out tonight? We gotta hang out before I move to Madison. BTW I'm moving to Madison.
Dude I think I was making out with the cat last night
I don't have a cat..?
Well nonetheless. Whatever it was purred when I used tounge.
Think of this as an opportunity. Like Jesus just opened up his closet, and inside is an endless supply of huge, beautiful cock.
Sorry we couldn't "turn off the mirrors." How're you feeling today?
how do you not remember that?! you winked at the bouncer and then proceeded to grind on him while chugging a beer. i don't know if i should be proud or embarrassed to be your friend
Suppose hypothetically u received a request for face time communication with a gentleman who looked astonishingly like a penis. Would you indulge him in conversation? Hypothetically of course.
Why can't people give useful wedding gifts...like sex swings or Nutella?
We really shouldn't need this many nicknames for the women you've had sex with.
I'm beginning to think that women just have dogs at home as an excuse to leave ASAP after hooking up, without sounding like a typical guy.
Who are you, and why are you in my phone as Elf on the Shelf
The only way he could ever pleasure me is if he lit himself on fire and let me watch
I washed my sheets. I did out of respect for my previous and current sexual partners.
So, i might have left my morals back in 2011.
My boyfriend just called me on his poop break from work.... Is that what you meant by moving too fast?
Randomize
