Is there a reason "Call me when you're legal" is written on my arm? I'm 22..
I just woke up to me licking the dognuts
You mean Doughnuts?
......No :(
please dont make me drink to the titanic soundtrack
Ya. I was the definition of a shit show. I woke up outside my door when my alarm went off
No, the real question is if you drink like I drink why WOULDN'T you wear a cape.
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
despite the cops showing up at 8am, pre gaming groundhog day was my idea yet. and by pre gaming, i of course mean getting black out drunk by 7:30am
I'm on tinder and every time somebody says something too creepy for me I start quoting scripture at them. My boobs are like missionaries.
So, I without a doubt haven't used the bag I'm now carrying since we were dating. Just had to discreetly throw out an unopened magnum in a bus station.
When I woke up I had 6 missed calls making sure I was ok and asking if I remember showing my tits to a picture of her baby.
She's sent me the same nudes using the same gestures and positions... It's like she has a template for her sluty-ness
Its 9 am & i've been cleaning for 6 hours now with occasional crying bursts and two cocktails. Adulting 101.
How do you feel about a threesome?
Will you be there?
I'm the one asking!
after we fucked i left the room and when i came back he was patting his dick whispering "prouda you lil guy...prouda you"
Good, but still not as good as the guy I banged in the ball crawl
Randomize
