Went to mcdonalds... Wishing I could throw up the last 20 hours of my life.
I gave up sex for lent.
I guess that means I'm postponing our date until after Easter.
"I could never have "feelings" for someone who, at one point, wanted to "hate fuck" my face."
well seeing as i got a call at 5 am from the hotel manager telling me my cousin was passed out on the lobby floor...not good
Judging by the hole in the wall by the door, the mis-matched shoes by the door, and the door hanging off one hinge... i'd say he's on the loose.
Oh god the guy I took underwear from at the bar is trying to add me as a friend on facebook now.
I really wanna know when trying to grow up turned into try not to throw up.
Someone at all my grapes... if it was you or one of your hoodrat friends I swear to god I'll shit in your shampoo
It's not ok to announce to a group of people playing beer pong that a girl put her finger in your butt last night. I now know this
Just yelled out loud for someone to buy me a drink, 30 seconds later random guy on grindr asks what I'm drinking.
There's a 98% chance your drink will taste like rohypnol
Sleeping in a car was not on my list of plans for the night.
She called to say the cops were not fake cops. some one has to go get her in an hour
That's too much drama for once a month dick... that's in-house dick drama only
It's wednesday. OF COURSE HE'S DRUNK.
Come on in. I'm butt naked, in the kitchen, eating ice pops
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