did u really fuck my little sister???
im not saying yes or no but just know that my answer rhymes with "mess"
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
Apologies for hacking your facebook and posting that picture of you passed out hooked up to the IV...but we were sat with you on the ER floor for 3 hours, it got boring
I guess birthday shots aren't always the answer
I almost bumped into a man wrapped only in a blanket at 10 am
i think the title to my autobiography shall be, "a bottle of vodka and various pieces of meat"
and this is why you're my favorite gay friend.
From now on when a guy sends me a dick picture I'm going to send them a picture of some other dudes dick.
You would think that me seductively unzipping my cat feetie pajamas would make him want to fuck me.
I was wearing my get used bookstore shirt when we fucked. Ironic yet appropriate.
Is re-gifting a Valentine's Day present worse than re-gifting a Xmas one?
You're unbelievable, unbelievably awesome.
So you'd go straight for a fat chick with cheese on her tits?
Yes.
Is it possible to be sexually attracted to someone's hair?
I'm eating cereal out of a cocktail shaker. That kind of blizzard.
Not exactly hook line and sinker right away, but I'll give him a second chance. I should sext him me in my blue shark onesie.
Here when you come to your senses come back here and I'll fuck you back out of them.
Randomize
