I feel if a girl leaves my house the next morning feeling degraded and in desparate need of a shower, then I have succeeded.
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
you kept going on about how you couldnt haven been the one throwing up because you were peeing in circles.
All my credit cards need to be pressure washed
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
my mom just walked in on me in the shower doing the "ass hair shave" pose.
How drunk is "too drunk" for candlelight service?
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
But break dance skills will only take you so far
just found out I was hugging strangers at the bar last night. there's photographic evidence. I know none of them
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
The sex was so good I feel like I could run a triathlon, hit big at the casino, and defeat ISIS.
I just saw a woman give her infant whiskey tits. About ten minutes ago she was doing shots, and now she's breast feeding. Whiskey. Tits.
Im bringing my light up rubber ducky just in case we end up at a rave tonight. HE CHANGES COLOR!
she said. She was going to, and I quote, "put her vagina inside my dick".
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