I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
Is it sad that the only reason I haven't lapsed into depression is that I'm prettier than her?
Nah, we all need something.
His health insurance plan WILL NOT cover Lasix surgery but it WILL cover 100% of a penis enlargment operation...
He jacked off on my pillow when he found out I left. It was like coming home and finding that your dog, with separation anxiety, had pooped in your shoes. I think I'm flattered...
Yeah, all the sudden I heard a loud "ding" and realized I had been passed out on the dorm elevator for about an hour....
Ps. The strap-on in the pic i sent you last night was not mine. Just wanted to clear that up.
I'm taking her home. She just told a 90 yo woman in a packers hat to "suck her cock".
We were naked in bed for hours and we didn't have sex. Either he's gay or he wants to respect me. Neither of which I approve of.
You may genuinely find a use for the siphon. But the bag of human hair is less likely.
You told her to step on the scale because you had whiskey goggles, and scales don't lie.
Finals week...the biggest cock block since your brother threatened me with a beer bottle at the bar.
Cry into your wine glass and then drink the tears, it's like the fountain of youth
Exactly. Stay back and unsubscribe from her
hahaha every time i hear a motorcycle i think about that one time you almost died
Thanks for the flashbacks you prick.
I just baptized you in budweriser and you were cool with it
Randomize
