No, you can still breathe under the balls.
Woman walking into toby keith concert: 8 months pregnant, black eye, shirt on that has a picture of a boot and the words "we'll put a boot up your ass" with an american flag printed over--the sleeves were ripped off and she had a camo cowboy hat. Greatest thing I've ever seen.
this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
if your not going to answer your phone this is just going to be an embarrassment tomorrow
We're attempting to get a tally of how may people puked last night...Please respond with your vomit status.
I cagt a turtle and named him squirt. He's in my bathtub Caleb is feeding me peaches! This is the most beautiful vodka Thursday ever!
if I open my eyes, my head will explode. that hungover.
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
I need rollerblades now
Rollerblades pick up bitches
Also, I just realized you seduced me while in a batman onesie... Well done, sir. Well done.
I ended up in th ER yelling my height weight and age
Just try not to have a boner when you're giving your best man speech, it will really kill the vibe
THERE ARE SO MANY HOT DADS AT WHOLE FOODS
I like that you're more concerned about how I would find the time to clone you, than the fact that I have your blood.
We made out in front of everyone INCLUDING his girlfriend. And no one saw. THAT DRUNK!
Randomize
