just took a shot of grandma at the fucking bowling alley... this is going to be interesting
Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
He actually believes he's not an alcoholic if he doesn't go to meetings.
My vagina smells like strawberry tangerine twist.
Some rando is vomiting profusely into the garden outside the employee entrance. Where are you when things like this happen to me?
Vomiting outside the employee entrance
I'm not making any promises. But if I start throwing food at you, just go with it.
When he wears his hair down and sandals, he looks like Jesus. A Jesus I would fuck.
That's not what Jesus is for
Please assure him that the flying penis statue is for display purposes only.
I feel so much better about my break up knowing that he's having his 26th birthday at Rollar kingdom\n
He managed to crash an entire train of shopping carts into a wall. I think he noticed my implants.
Sneaking the vodka in was the easy part.. listening to medley of puking in the porta pottys was not
he said we should drink responsibly and we all just kinda sat there laughing at him
She has the best kind of daddy issues
I have four things I would like to do over summer too... Problem is they're all roommates
The air taste purple.
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