I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
just woke up in a hotel room.. realizing its the hotel i work at.. lets see how this walk of shame turns out
Hey is it bad when your boss leans over your desk and tells you "you smell like the Rainforest Cafe"??
and his room smelled like strippers, childrens tears, and fear
Does anyone know who that girl who fell backwards and broke the shoe rack with her head was?
she made out with a stripper. how was scrabble night with your girlfriend
your mom just called me and asked me why i'm not in jail with you right now.
I feel like everyone would be happy with that as a present too. "Oh you got me pussy for Christmas?! How'd you know?!"
If you wake up tomorrow and start to wonder.... Yes you did just eat mild sauce from taco bell out of the package while informatively yelling about the loss of my virginity
Yeah, surprised you made it on time this morning. Remarkable, considering 2 hours ago you were pretending to be talking window curtains.
I don't know what was up he just kept sitting in his chair smoking weed and watching home movies all night it was weird as fuck.
Is it bad if I just put band-aids over my nipples? Way too hungover be dealing with a bra
Thats not real though. Slash there are other extenuating circumstances to lead me to believe dick is wanted
HOLY FUCK I SPELLED EXTENUATING RIGHT ON THE FIRST TRY. IM THE BEST DRUNK NA
Fell off the toilet trying to reach to put my tampon in the garbage. Pride hurts real bad.
I'm not big on drama but you need to put your pants on and leave.
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