yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me.
Eating alone in the dark with one candle. This is sorta sad.
in fingerprint form on my ass. Seriously not cool. \ni bruiiiseeee like a delicate fruiiiitttt. Heeeaaarrr the rythymmm
That's right. If she can't abide by the rules then she gets booted. It's like survivor booty call edition
My wedding band has saved me from at least four cases of herpes tonight.
I thought of you this morning when I woke up in a bed with a girl wrapped in duct tape dressed as a coors light can.
Like lay upon bear skin rugs, drink brandy and reminisce of the yesteryear's before a majestic fire place? Because those are my plans.
im currently assessing the tequila situation in preparation of your arrival
Someone just walked into the bar with a pillow
I don't know whether to judge him or give him a high five
Did I send you a naked snap the other day with a fat blunt in my mouth with the caption "$1200 bitches!" ?
Whatever. I'll take my new fine ass dick sucking nails elsewhere.
Did you really eat 10 ice cream cones today?
It was tough but I powered through it.
I just matched the dude who's car I rear ended 2 years ago on tinder. I don't think he remembers.
I was so high I forgot how to swallow food, and I just kept thinking "thank god its just mashed potatoes, they'll go down eventually"
Randomize
