Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
I don't know what I could have possibly done in a past life to deserve watching my boyfriend projectile vomit margaritas and probs blood while completely naked.
...i had to draw her a diagram of her own vagina. including a little arrow to the clitoris. shouldn't it be the other way around?!?
its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
franzia sundays are my new favorite holiday
Did you know the Dallas Cowboy cheerleaders have an exercise show ON Demand? Yeah, I had a lonely night
In the library. Still drunk. Shoes missnig. Term paper due in fiften minutes. Iff I puke u think theyll throw me out?
Definately laid on the floor of the shower this morning drinking the water as it fell on me.
Exactly. So you're exempt under the "I can't just fuck her to make it go away" clause of 2010.
I still have beer shits from last weekend. Dying from dysentary is a real threat at this point.
She dressed up in a sexy maid outfit for me, but she got mad when I asked her to actually do some cleaning.
We got hammered last night and I woke up this morning with texts from 'iron maiden chick.' wtf?
I just wanna get high and take a fucking awesome nap. Those are my goals for the week.
I mean there are real risks associated with having unprotected sex, but I don’t think I need to worry about a ghost possessing me and having unprotected sex while using my body
New one isn't as good asmy ex. She won't put her tongue up my butt
Peter this is your "ex"
I stand by what i said
Randomize
