Is snow just God skeeting all over the place??
Yes. Yes it is.
He passed out on the floor and you kept hitting him in the dick and screaming "hammer of justice".
We left the house and she said "let's go dick hunting" theres no way last night was gonna end up well
Lightning struck the tree right outside of her window as I came inside her. I think its God's way of saying go by plan b.
Around noon tomorrow come looking for me. I'll be on Mill wearing whatever clothes I haven't lost yet. DO NOT REPLY. DO NOT ASK QUESTIONS. JUST DO IT.
I just used FaceTime as a look out while I got a blowjob in the library
it's like I can see my whorish nature reflected back at me in his wedding ring.
Don't feel sorry for me. I'm getting Red Lobster and sex tonight. Nothing can bring me too far down.
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
Look on the bright side: Now that I'm sleeping with both the exs it's good bye to drunk sexting the 'wrong one'.
I just got my beard fondled by a drunk chick outside the venue. I feel slightly violated. And I think her boyfriend wanted to fight me.
I'm dying. The alcohol is viciously exiting my tiny body.
As I was balls deep, she moaned "i can't wait to see what how hot our daughter will be". Instant de-boner
2016 was supposed to be my year of being a ho, but I guess 2017 might be too.
Things he has managed to cum on so far on spring break: my bikini, my back-up bikini, three of my four bras, two pairs of panties, four beds, six chairs, the floor of several hotel rooms, the window/door to the balcony from both sides, my tits, my face, my stomach, his stomach, my ass, his best friend's girlfriend's face, and his best friend's dick.
Just FYI spring break is over and you're supposed to be back in class but hey sounds like you had your orgy so congrats.
Randomize
