if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
the cashier at riteaid just made the sign of the cross before he rang up my pregnancy test. now i know god is on my side
Woke up. Made a pizza. Burnt it. Going back to bed cuz today sucks
I just randomly started counting the number of guys that I've hooked up with that are now gay. 11.
I wish straight boys touched me the way gay boys do.
you act like breakfast cereal isnt an entirely appropriate chaser
So I'm drinking wine and watching Thumbelina
I'm teaching my cat to play fetch
Yep, it's a friday
Well I sent him a pic of my vagina and sent back a pic of his puppy....so there's that
If that's all it takes to cure your hangovers then you need to drink more.
I have poison ivy and a broken finger. Don't have a threesome in the woods.
Thought for a game. Duck, Duck, Grey Goose. If you're tapped, you take a shot. Then proceed as normal.
So this is what bad decisions tastes like...
So her ex boyfriend came up a lot in conversation while I was fucking her. Is that weird?
Who the fuck has a conversation during sex?
Randomize
