Is it weird if i grunt like Tim Taylor when im having sex AND grilling steaks??
i just recognized the girl sitting across from me from a lesbian porno... should i ask for an autograph?
I am growing concerned with the number of people here in cowboy hats
someone needs to get her out of the garbage can shes never gonna forgive us for this
Dude, you face planted, there was no "bar fight".
Judging by the crutches in the living room I take it you two are fine and we aren't going out tonight?
Either call me back or tell me you're in jail. For fucks sake. If this is a cop, just help out. national league.
This bitch flirting at the bar needs to close her legs and open up a book. I can literally feel my IQ dropping every time she bends down to show her tits.
Jealous?
Very.
there's no excuse to just assume your pants won't be coming off for some reason or another. that's just irresponsible
Because Kyle had a tattoo kit at his house and I wanted one and all he could draw was a mustache or a stickman on fire
Everybody shut up a minute, we need to discuss how much nicer the world would be if pants weren't a thing.
Oh jesus...leave it to you to hit on not one but two guys who can't fuck you till marriage.
im glad im back to a point in my life where i have enough sex to sometimes be offered and be like naw im good.
long story short, he tried to fuck me standing up, toppled over, and now I have four stitches next to my eye
Like my mom really needs to know just how non existent my sex life is
Randomize
