The walk of shame is slightly more complicated when you wake up in the wrong country...
I just saw a license plate that said "Guidete" at college. This proves the world is officially ending in 2012
Well the party says they're going to have three kegs and four trampolines. I think I'm going to invite my EMT buddies just to be safe.
haha it staarrted out with just getting drunk then it turned into sports authority. So now im 4th or 5th in line and shit faced. Help me
Well right now I am watching him use the fire extinguisher off the pourch.
I cartwheeled across every street... They tried to stop me but I bit anyone who came near me
He was handing out home-made business cards that read "finger slamming bitches since 1986"\n
He said he wanted to "superfuck" me
Does he wear a cape??
I'm wearing a suit and have no chance of getting laid or robing a casino. I consider this opportunity a failure
Yeah I'm at the doctors getting a shotand don't know how to tell them I'm still probably drunk from last night
No it was fine, I've just never seen that many people eat dog food
They had like literally all the dildos. It looked like a seance for dick. I left the apartment and haven't been back.
Should I rub the neighbors amazon package in the dog shit they left on the front steps?
Am i obligated to tell my sister her girlfriend was my one night stand three months ago?
Do you think he will let me wear my neck fan while he throws my back out?
Please shut the fuck up.
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