Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill
i'm only drinking out of pineapples from now on.
Apparently in gay bars the restroom signs are just a formality. Its a free for all in there
I need to figure out how to tell my doctor that I don't want to fix my possible fertility problems until AFTER I'm done whoring around in my 20s.
I mean...he was throwing up for almost 3 consecutive hours. I don't think there's a chance in hell that would have tasted even close to tolerable.
He leaned over in the middle of the movie and said "My dick's name is Juan". WHO DOES THAT?
He referred to his penis as "a gentle giant" and said I had offended it
Also this freshmen guy is talking about his gag reflex and no one is making blowjob jokes. I have no faith in the next generation.
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
Would it be weird to bake him a cake that says "sorry I peed on your bed"?
.... I'm on a random couch somewhere in Newark wrapped in a Lightning McQueen blanket
Your penis is the destroyer of worlds.
I need an outfit that says "thanks for hiring me" but also says "i want dick in my mouth".
No I’m scared man. She sharted. In my car. Wearing a dress. And I still like her.
Wow
Finally hooked up with Ryan. Now I know why they call him “Beast Mode”. So. Many. Orgasms.
Randomize
