Are you seriously drinking already? It's 11AM. Still morning.
I'm going by McDonald's time. And since they stop serving breakfast at 10:30 and start serving lunch, it is now afternoon.
its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
You owe me a new pair of headphones. You plugged mine into the top of a mustard bottle.
so i never found you. but i found vodka. so its kinda the same
You kept trying to hail an ambulance
Apparently I confessed my love for him last night. Also, my love for cash4gold commercials.
He is juggling broken glass botttles, I think its time to cut him off...
She gave me a foot massage while her friend rode me. Your gf puked into the oscolating fan. How were our nites alike?
She told me she loves her boyfreind while she was giving me head. He must be a nice guy
Dont worry about getting me anything... Just put a bow on your ass.
Deal.
This girl ordered Hershey syrup and red wine and he made it for her
I just want to have beer shits in my own bathroom. Is that too much to ask for?
I can see your house from here
Get off of his fucking roof
Shut up. You had me at killer robots. Your place or mine?
I'd rather explain to the cops why I'm naked than why I'm drunk.
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