I need to shower the guilt off of my thighs.
If there was chocolate on Regis Philban's dick, I would totally lick it off. That's how desperate I am for some right now.
My life would be so much easier if i could just ride around in the cash cab all day
she just made me lysol my hands in order to touch her tits.
Ever had blood in your semen? I am guessing that's a problem.
thats what you get for writing a paper after liquor pitchers
its only a rough draft.
She tried to lure me back to her house by saying she had "real" pizza.
He was with one girl when I went to bed, wad with another when I woke up and now he just told me he was with a 3rd in-between last night and this morning. Jesus Christ.
I just wanted to clarify that I am not bisexual and had no intentions of ACTUALLY penetrating my roommate with a can of bugspray.
It's been this way for a few days. I had chick fil a on Friday so this could be an attack from the Gay Gods as punishment.
Got stiff armed by the garbage man on the back of the truck...I just wanted to ride one block dude
Also... I'm unsure what to do with my face while someone is choking me during sex. Like I feel like its hard to look flattering.
I don't think I have face palmed that many times in such a short period. And I've worked tech support.
I told him I just left the convent and really wanted a man. He fell for it. Sure beats telling him I'm a nympho stalker that followed him to the bar when I saw his beard.
She’s either doing coke or thinks my cock has the Covid vaccine. Either way I haven’t worn clothes in 3 days
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