well look at the bright side
maybe you can be on an episode of "I Didn't Know I Was Pregnant"
Lesson 1: you can't keep macking on a girl if you get handcuffed
dude they were twins that means they were both only 17
This guy just brought his piggy bank into the bar with him. Talk about corruption of childhood.
Wore last nights jeans to Christmas Dinner with the fam, found a half gram of blow, while they're praying ill be railing.
Dude sorry but it totally wasn't worth going back in there for yous shoes
If I had to give her an idea on what it means to be ur date I would compare it to being Ralph macchio's gf in the first karate kid... That's one of the coolest things I've ever said... I love drugs.
Putting a breathalyzer in a bar is a horrible idea. But I won
Wait... All I had to do was ask for a sandwich and you would have come over
so my pro life roomate found a used condom wrapped up in her sheets with your panties. never letting you have sex in her bed again
I'm going back to his house to watch wreck it Ralp.
Hey, Monsters Inc. got me laid. Disney man, who knew it leads to sex.
My grandpa is driving me to get condoms and wine. This is adulthood.
I'll accept that I'm a woo girl. Just not the drunk cowboy hat wearing bar mongering twat bag type
I think I've done enough damage with my vagina as of late, thank you
"keg stand!" on a roof abruptly turned into "call the medics"
Randomize