How do you know one of your one night stands hasn't produced a child? You may have hundreds of kids.
Pretty sure I don't. One night stands are purely anal..no exceptions.
Is it sanitary to roast marshmallows over a cigarette lighter?
just had cupcakes and mountain dew for dinner-now i'm playing super mario brothers. 10 year olds all over the world would kill to be me.
He just compared himself to a majestic butterfly in regards to the lack of girlfriends. i don't even know what to say.
The fire breather is here so I may get my second wind.
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
I just had a flashback to the three of us in the bed and me shouting AM I THE BIGGEST OR LITTLEST SPOON?!
the only thing you said was do the helicopter dick
Dude he did say "let's go cougar hunting" and you KNEW your mom was going out last night...so it's kind of your own fault for not coming
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
Someone took a shit in the house somewhere and I STILL can't find it. I'm just going to move.
I was playing 'If You Had To Fuck One or Die' with the old composite pictures with a guy in the bathroom line. They were all pretty ugly so I go "You can tell this is a lower tier frat"......turns out the guy was a brother
You know I was thinking and I've never seen a penis in a whirlpool before
Sometimes being bisexual is a curse. Turns out I banged both of her older twin brothers last summer.
you would have been so proud of how classy i just looked at the pharmacy with my $10 off plan b coupon. so resourceful.
Randomize
