What is the appropriate way to inform him that I am TOTALLY down for break up sex?
After you vomited on the patrol car, you thanked the officer for helping you up off the ground. I don't think you realized you were being arrested.
The problem with Wednesday evening drinking is that no gets to my level. It's like like a one man party. But it's a goood party.
took off my bra and popcorn fell out of it. im gonna puke at this wedding...
you ate the make a wish sign. Like actually chewed on it. It was our solution to going outside when the cops were there
There must be a happy medium universe where you get it on with my girlfriend enough to cause me pain but not a full on cardiac arrest. It's a fine line to tread though.
I was packing a bowl naked and her dog just stared at me with pure rage
He said we would have a beautiful daughter together. That way too much for a one night stand...
All I know is when I checked my phone this morning google translate was open with "help the cow ate my robot" translated to French
He won't have sex to beyonce. I hate him.
I just drove my booty call to his booty call, if that isn't spreading the love, I don't know what is.
I threw up in my backpack last night, but at least it wasn't in the pizza box again
When God made him he put all his talent in his dick. What he lacks in brain, he makes up for in loin.
He stopped mid-fuck to explain his choice in pillows. HE WAS STILL IN ME!
I told him. He hasn't said anything. Crying and holding cats is probably what is happening.
Randomize
