do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
i mean really, i cant compete with a cucumber
He toold me that when we were younger I was his boner buddy.
she was masturbating to a video of herself masturbaing. She's a keeper
Remember when puke and rally meant a good time? Fuck pregnancy
I was super proud of him for making a mature relationship decision, and then I remembered that he cheated on her. With me.
We were still up at 6am, taking shots, because thats apparently how he liked to "get the day started".
Btw, I feel the need to make sure we have no misunderstanding about this. So here goes. I'll happily mess around with you again. However, I probably won't do it while you're dressed like a creepy clown. Or any clown.
she's p upset bro
Where is he. I have a sword.
I can hear the pillow talk now, "how many condoms did you bring? Good, put them all on,"
You know you're good at multi-tasking if you can get a lap dance from someone while simultaneously eating a burrito.
He showed up completely drunk with a 30 of PBR and ten cans of Spam. I like this kid.
Well that didn’t go as expected.
I mean, it ended in you giving each of them a blowjob, so it kinda did.
So I took a screenshot of my boarding pass and the TSA agent somehow swiped it to the next photo. Yep...TSA saw my dick before I even went through the body scanner.
I apparently sent an offer letter to, and then subsequently onboarded, the wrong candidate. How's your Monday?
Randomize
