There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
There was this creepy guy on the bus. So I puffed out my stomach & began so hold my stomach like I was preggers.
Some girl just asked us for directions back to campus. we told her to take the first four lefts. We live on a block. she believed us
Was this before, or after you took my brand new bag of shredded cheese, and "Made it rain"?
Just asked my dog if he was proud of me for making it home. That drunk.
Hey, did you take me to hospital last night?
Hi. This might be awkward, but I met you on saturday at about 330 am. I have to admit I don't remember your name, what we talked about, or various details of how I got home. What I do remember is that I was invested enough in getting your number to ask my cab driver for a pen to write it down since my phone was dead. So do you want to meet, soberer, some time?
Hey bro I think you got the wrong number I'm a dude
So my quick shower turned into a "lay in the shower and let the hot water reign over you because you are too hungover to wash your hair" shower. I'll be there closer to 1:30!
dude I just found tht weird ass guy u invited last night passed out in my closet.... apparently he "couldn't find the exit"
But if I live with you I'll help pay rent. Only if you promise no 50 shades of what the fuck internet hookups
I'm still questioning who dropped me off last night. So successful wedding?
he's the kind of guy you give a fake number to and he still finds out your real number anyway...
You drank the pool water to get rid of your hiccups
Have I told you i love you?
there's no need we are two peas in a naughty pod of fuckery
If you survived your 72 hour masturbation marathon put on some pants and come over. My mom dropped off a lasagna.
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