didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
I woke up this morning with I hate myself feeling
four loko is officially banned. leave it to the kids from a state school to fuck it up for everyone
He came to my house drunk at two a.m., got in the hot tub, refused to get out until he smoked a blunt, and said "That's what brothers and sisters are for."
I should probably just look up vagina pictures in the anatomy textbook. That always cheers me up.
he says he is going to get you very high and make you leave the country with him
possibly by boat
I'm confused as to why I have a picture of your boobs in response to a photo of my father
Guy hitting on me at bar is guy who's Craigslist ad we laughed at the other night. Not even kidding.
I want you to get off the plane and get directly into my pants
Either he pets my cat or this deal is null
We were covered in sweat and glitter, making out onstage, in front of everyone. I think it was a good night.
You peed in a public fountain and then felt bad so you put dish soap in it; 4 ft tall bubbles.
Is it weird that I have your number saved in my phone as baby Jesus?
So I think my neighbor's name is Olli if I'm hearing the girl the girl he's fucking clearly
Its like a glacier coming out of my asshole.
Randomize
