Your face is a jimmy john
Regardless, you never quit out of your interenet. You left your porn on the living room comp. Then you passed out four feet from the chair with your hand still down your pants. We decided that we should go back to her place instead. Worlds best wingman.
So I have exactly 420 dollars saved up in tips from the past week. I win, and I take that as a sign from god that I am allowed to use that money to buy drugs.
she said "feliz nobby job" then proceeded to give me a blowjob.
we need 14,000 post its to execute this plan
hes a good boy he deserves a good blow
my mom sold the house because of the grow room the couple saw i had in the basement.
He had the smallest penis i'd ever seen. I can see why he drinks his life away.
Does anyone know who that girl who fell backwards and broke the shoe rack with her head was?
I literally just wrote "I'm sorry" in my blue book, got up and walked out
I just made the answer to all my security questions "fuck you" with various levels of ! marks. I may regret this in the morning.
In other news, I apparently ate my retainers while rolling last night.
I am going to bedazzle the shit out of your Basilisk costume.
just threw up in a gas staton parking lot in front of a father and son. stared them in the eyes and finished like a boss
Don't know where this pizza came from but i got breakfast in bed
Randomize
