really keith? you showed me your dick and your not gonna text me back
three guys just busted into my bio lecture, yelled "happy st. patrick's day!", downed jagerbombs, and left.
Apparently I climbed into a dryer last night and refused to leave... There are pictures to prove it
How many times a week can a couple have a threesome with the same guy before it becomes some sort of 3-way relationship?
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
there's a barbecue in the shower. I'd like to know who got this to fit inside perfectly. impressive
As usual, I had to fight him for his car keys. Though this time he made it to the valet garage. All the Hispanic attendants gathered around and watched. Felt like I was in a cock fight.
the mechanics of walkigng feel weird right now everyone lools like a demon
what does alcohol mean
I might not remember all of last night but I clearly remember the part where I humped the mailbox.
His voice is like having sex with hot chocolate and then suddenly you're pregnant.
You came home And decided to make beer battered bacon... That's why there was smoke
Well then she has to know whoever you were kissing was in overalls because that's not a detail you just leave out.
So you're saying that I ended up challenging a dude to Uno then proceed to punch them in the face?
This is very awkward but where is my dildo, Mom
If you wear a peguin suit you MUST send me a picture!!!
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