I told him I'm not paying rent anymore because he's seen my boobs.
The new Black Eyed Peas song is the stupidest shit I've heard since the last Black Eyed Peas song.
Plus apparently whenever one of her friends loses their virginity they get a party with a funfetti cake which I found funny
I apologize for forcing you to look at my boob when we were high. It was uncalled for
I hope you don't have to start the day explaining to me how you failed to turn "Can I practice my belly dancing in your apartment" into all night sex.
Are we still banned from the library?
Were going to have to vacuum the bathtub, great party
i mean, not my actual scene but if someone says "PARTY" ill figure it out
Just had a horrible realization. I've fucked a guy with a webbed foot AND a guy with a third nipple.
So my mind was like YOU ARE TOTALLY GONNA MAKE IT TO CLASS TODAY but then my body was all LOL NO YOU AIN'T.
I would like you to know I am eating your apology chocolate, which means i forgive you for puking everywhere before formal
The internet is out at West Chester so I'm masturbating using my imagination. What is this, the fucking dark ages?
painting my nails while super high-drunk. Ended up painting my entire hands. Both.
no body wants to do anything today cause it's too cold, but a guy can only masturbate so many times a day. Ya know
He has a beach house and a Simba tattoo. Our wedding is next Tuesday, hope you're free.
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