i left him drunk and in the fetal postion in the shower.
was the water running?
yeah but he said he knows how to swim
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
I'm way too horny to be at work right now. I think it might be legally irresponsible to leave me alone with cucumbers.
i found her half dressed with her feet in the washer..she said it was sooo warm.
I prob couldn't even get his attention if I had a dick growing out of my forehead
Joe decreed the livingroom and the hallway up to the burn mark his kingdom. I think this is the point of 'stage an intervention'
Worst part of blacking out... Waking up and having to do the teeth check
I'm mentally preparing myself to hang out with him by staring into the mirror saying "thou shalt not get naked" over and over.
You are a special snowflake. A special snowflake I wouldn't mind rough sex with
You know you're in the hamptons when it's 10pm And you kind of want to vomit white wine on rug that costs more than your apartment.
They have beer where we have blood.
All you need is a handful of lube and an open mind
MY LIFE IS HARD OK. I HAVE TO WAKE UP AT LIKE 10 OR 11 AFTER SMOKIG POT AND PLAYING FALLOUT UNTIL 3
Just because I stayed up all night betting on Australian Horse Racing doesn't mean I have a gambling program.
If you wanna fuck the pudding, fuck the pudding. Just not the chocolate, Im gonna eat that.
Randomize