he keeps his weed in a birkenstock shoe box. its like, we get it, youre from oregon.
Hangovers were designed by God when he decided that so far he had taken it WAY TOO EASY on me.
dude literally just took me 4 trips to take out the recycling from last night. we need to have parties like this more often
I think my sister is getting tired of me breaking into her house so I can sleep with random girls when shes not there
Is it too forward to say "stop being a good friend and start being a good fuck buddy"
Marshall is naming all the elements of my face. I love science nerds.
Someone downtown drunkenly stole the antenna off of her car... while she was driving.
i made this one couple from ohio so uncomfortable that they left....and that was WHEN I HAD PANTS ON
we broke the bed, curtan rods, a dresser drawer, and unless I didn't notice it before, we put a hole in the wall. This is why he and I have to fuck in motels.
She came out of my bathroom wearing nothing but high top Converse, a leather jacket and a tongue stud. I love rock bars.
Omg this place. I'm at a neighborhood party. My mom has kissed two other moms. Where am I
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
are you still up? I want to use you for sexual things. you have 35 minutes to respond to this offer.
I like the new guy, he keeps beer in the fridge.
New life goal: Sex in a parking lot surrounded by a circle of fire.
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