Gte hit a new low, I took a poopnap, passed out mid poop on the toilet.
guys don't fucking realize that the only place girl like their faces jizzed on is in PORN, and that "squirting" is piss. JUST FUCKING PISS.
Haha, bad night?
I like waking up with a slight hangover cause I'm dehydrated and it makes me feel thinner.
I may still return these pants. Depends how much they smell like alcohol by tmrw morning. I've already spilled once.
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
Always wear a seatbelt when giving road head. I think I'm just going to tell people I don't remember how I got the fat lip.
i accidenteley seduced the christian girl's brother so i dont think we can count on free church picnic food again
I just watched our fat male neighbor dibble a soccer ball across the lawn. It looked like Baywatch with diabetes
I woke up in a tow truck cuddling plan b. Can you pick me up?
Also I've been at work for an hour and I've already been "honey"d "babe"d and "beautiful"d by three separate men. Apparently hungover with yesterdays make up looks good on me.
I'd risk everything I own for 10 min naked with her, 2 would be sex and the rest me crying like a little girl.
I need to sleep so I can die properly tomorrow.
Also fuck yeah conspiracy
Sorry I missed your call. I was in the shower washing away my sins and sweat. Please tell me you want to get drunk as shit later.
Randomize
