1. No more tequila 2. Why do you let me say slutty things? 3. I woke up and our apartment was covered in cake? 4. Love you
she doesn't hate you. She just thinks you need a personality adjustment, speech therapy and weight watchers.
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
Dude, we totally smoked up inside a church organ last night. Add this to the epic list.
no memory loss, but i'm unhappy with my memories
Afterwards she kept poking it and saying "it looks so sad and small" I dont know if I wanted to reach this state in our relationship...
Come over and help me clean up your so-called "winter wonderland" that you made with the fire extinguisher in the kitchen last night.
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
okay the fridge is completely filled only with alcohol. Not even exaggerating. There is no food.
Sometimes I wonder if we're going to make it to 40.
I think its awesome that i just got you to cheer for sex
Well sex is awesome. Sex deserves cheers.
New fuck buddy and long time fuck buddy are carpooling home for thanksgiving. #10hrconvoaboutmyblowjobskills
You know your night is done when the police confiscate your bra at high school basketball game
Next guy I fuck must be a cowboy
whenever i get involved w someone i'm gonna give you their number to testify to the fact that they should not fall in love with me
if I dont text you back in 10min assume i am in fact still dizzy and injured myself in the shower. and call an ambulance. thanx.
Randomize
