Just got a citation from campus security for an "accordion disturbance."
I swear that men would be more efficient if they had a semen gauge on their penises
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
I think jizz is working it's way to becoming my number 1 food source.
I seriously just washed my dick in a public restroom. That's how dirty last night got
I left a care package of Jack Daniel's, pancake mix and porn in your apartment. Merry fucking Christmas.
He's asking if he can send a dick pic. How do I politely decline that?
there is a guy passed out on top of me and i don't know what to do. help if you're awake? was anyone anyone expecting someone? maybe he found the wrong room?
University has ruined us all. I just had to clarify the last time I had sex as "No, not at the party we crawled home from in the snow. It was the one where you puked off the balcony and hit the barbecue."
This time last year I was crying in a church parking lot without shoes or a bra, so the years can only go up from here
We talked about breaking up, had sex, and in the middle of said sex, talked more about breaking up- best sad day ever
So, I think think I left my underwear at your house. Well...not exactly your house but your roof.
Come over here. Bongs and porn. I found the promised land
Dick is dick. I’m not turning it down because he’s younger than me. Covid has been a real cockblock and I’m a woman with needs
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