I bet i've been more pregnant than you.
I have two girls sleeping in my bed naked and I ended up making it to class, what were you saying about staying in on the weekdays?
I'm driving behind a lime green VW that has "Seniors '10!" shoe polished on the rear window. i haven't even seen her yet, but I do have a boner.
i love how cold weather makes identifying sluts easier. is it below freezing? is she wearing a tube top? she's easy.
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
im currently assessing the tequila situation in preparation of your arrival
what the hell is that chicken wire thing she's holding?
An artistic expression of her stupidity.
Worst drunk idea ever... Me "Cops are looking for two guys, one in a grey shirt one in a blue shirt" jelly "lets take out shirts off they'll never find us" of course I thought it was brilliant
Red flag bro. Her only friends are barflys and a teen with a fake ID
EMERGENCY FRIEND CRISIS: WE HAVE TOO MUCH WHISKEY. ABORT HANGING OUT WITH MELISSA, RECOMMEND TO HANG OUT WITH OUR WHISKEY INSTEAD
I never thought wine and chicken nuggets would end up being a thing that I did, but here we are
DROP EVERYTHING! Gatta go get tested for herpes, lets make an adventure out of it.
Yeah but if you conceived a child on a park slide that would be pretty awesome
I wonder if Paul and Andy realize how lucky that they are that we're too lazy to start fucking other dudes so we just stick with them
Oh my god, my vagina is cursed. He's cursed my vagina so that no one but him can maintain a boner around me. I'm sure of it.
Randomize