he was dropping me off and i told him i had to go to the bathroom and i leaned into kiss him and he asked how i went to the bathroom with a tampon up there... he was amazed that their was a third hole...and wanted me to show him where it was
Your roommate was biting my friend last night. It was weird.
The police are arresting two women who got in a fight for the last Twilight DVD at Best Buy. Classic.
He nailed 50 frozen hamburgers to the ceiling last night. Now there are flies every where.
she played "i just wanna get married" by jagged edge while we were having sex. why cant i avoid stage 5 clingers
i had to write a bad check to buy franzia last weekend. i have my priorities in line.
of all the people in our graduating class, this is exactly who would get pregnant.
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
I was the last girl at the bar last night. It was like a battle royale between 10 guys.
I don't know what to tell you, usually I would just ask if they'd like to meet the captain. If you can't get laid it's your problem.
Also, am I the only one who noticed he didn't fuck you until after you were technically a cripple? Or am I reading into this too much? Congrats on that btw
wow, being home for Xmas is freaking weird on tinder. I went to high school with everyone I'm matching... The fact that this many jocks like me now is a huge ego boost from my lack of glory days.
...and I'm done. I just matched two boys I used to babysit without realizing it.
I always feel bad for the sober driver... Never been me but I feel bad... empathetic AF
I had nothing but condoms at the checkout, then grabbed a pack of Orbitz gum and said "gotta protect from bad breath" felt like a boss
Sorry you uh had to see that last night. That's the problem with open fields, no privacy...
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