i feel like i'm waiting in line to date brett michaels
You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
i was so high i thought his mole came off and was flying around
We told the pizza man that the door was most likely unlocked, he could leave the pizza on the counter and give himself 20%. He did it-I'm never moving out of Aspen.
He is in the front yard trying to catch birds out of the air with a fishing net.
I drunkenly asked a stripper to join our volleyball team.
no. 1 rule of bromania: no females
There's sex hanging in the air like a pinata. European people are no joke.
Did you Fuck minivan and her friend last night?
TACOBELL COOL RANCH TACOS MARCH 7TH. I think realistically that will be more like valentines day for us. Bc nothing says romance like tacobell.
I smell like a skunk, but I'm okay with that.
SOMETIMES YOU HAVE TO BLAST VANESSA CARLTON IN YOUR CAR AT MIDNIGHT TO FEEL AGAIN. IDK.
Also, I'm not that drunk, but I'm thinking of pulling the blinds all the way up and casting some porn up onto the living room TV to establish dominance over our neighbors.
R.I.P my virginity. TOD 12:37pm
Randomize
