Did I ever tell you that the first person i made out with cried?
he asked me to help him wrap his girlfriends birthday presents. Dont worry we fucked right after.
So I was just looking through the calendar on my phone seeing what day new years was on & on dec 31st at 9am it says "nude champagne toast". Guess we have to do it.
im pretty sure while i was fucking her my dog was fucking her dog too
in case you havent found it already in honor of Toy story 3 we wrote ANDY on the bottom of your foot while you were passed out on the couch.
Also while I am being the bigger person I plan on bringing over something strong smelling and/or alcoholic to torture the poor hungover bastard
I am on a roof. I'm not sure which one, or why, or how, but I am on a roof and you should come get me. I can see info classrooms!
She refuses to believe she pulled down her pants and spanked her ass in front of us
He told me I was the only person he wanted to fuck in his rental mini van. Thats so romantic for a fuck buddy relationship.
Is there a word in the English dictionary for impressed, yet disgusted?
I think the word you're looking for is flabbergasted.
It wasn't even dirty talking, it was more like the soothing gentle nonsense noises you make when you've spooked a horse.
Tell the cops to let you through! Tell them you need to do drugs!
If I die, sorry about rent.
Correction: *I* watched JoJo's Bizarre adventure while he snored asleep on me cock still fully inside me.
She deleted me on Facebook. I think it's safe to say that she knows I fucked him now.
Randomize