Bigbird is at the bar Im at. whats her name
hearing that almost makes me feel good about peeing on the coffee table
I want to apologize in advance in the event I put my boobs in your face
Haha that's why you never name the penis. Its like a pet, once named you will most likely get attached.
I might come over. Something about you makes me matronly and I have this urge to nurse you back to health with soup and a blowjob
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
FULL ON LADY WOOD. YOU CAN SEE THE VEIN
THIS TIME TOMORROW MY VAG IS GONNA BE BRAND SPANKING NEW.
Dude. I legit missed class because I got too engrossed in the porn I was watching. Also I need to figure out how to get as flexible as these chicks. Some of the positions they do are outrageous.
wellllllll.... I literally just puked in my mouth so perhaps this is not the epic love connection I believed it to be 3 minutes ago.
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
I just took the batteries out of the xbox remote so she could replace the dead ones in her vibrator If that's not love I don't know what is
We tried to do sophisticated last night, but our low class kept shining through.
I just stole a bunch of balloons from a birthday party and am giving one to each person at the bar.
But can mardi gras accurately capture the essence of my tiny rage?
Randomize
