okay pat passed out under dana's car
windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
I'm so high, I forgot to harvest my farmville crops....noooooooo.
Worst stoner tragedy.
i was so drunk that i ate a carrot out of her guiena pig's cage and thought it was normal
So, I'm drinking, and I put my head down in the table. The cat jumped up to check on me, I have a cat sober monitor.
The 78 year old woman who works next to me divorced her ex husband, remarried her first husband, and retired all in one day. I'd say it makes your breakup on Valentine's day pretty insignificant.
If you've never been pounded by an Eastern European body builder, I would highly recommend it.
I told her shower beers are even better when you have someone in there with you and she said she's been looking for a new drinking buddy. It's a goooooo
If fixing it is ignoring it, and getting naked. Then yes we fixed it.
I was using my Beauty and the Beast blanket as a makeshift skirt because no pants
He sent me a blank text message. That's a booty call waiting to happen
"I'm pretty sure all our toasts were to Ben Afflecks penis last night."
Of course I fucked her, her man stole my bike when we were kids
Do you think he’ll fall in love with me if I tell him I have a nickname for his penis
never have sex with a mint flavored condom on. my vagina is on fire.
Randomize
