Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
Either these are mashed potatoes in my pants, or I was drunker than I thought.
The best part was her genuine shock and total "I didn't know" look when we said she couldn't cook a steak in a microwave.
Well he asked to have a sober hang out so i guess that constitutes as a date in college
So there's dick imprints in the peanut butter
she just made some guy spank her... then made some chick take a running start and spank her.
I'm making you a bingo card for hookups of the school year 2011-12 so you can make even worse life decisions next year
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
I'm sorry and I love you. One day we're going to live in a whore mansion with our babies and make boys cry.
Why are there hooting douchebags outside my building? Did a sport happen again?
Ever had someone sing happy birthday to you during sex?
We are trying to penis chicken awkward them out. But I think it's a gay wedding. Backfiring. Heavily.
You know you're getting old when 19 year olds you've met on tinder advise you that you should start looking for a wife and/or the mother of your children
Well that didn’t go as expected.
I mean, it ended in you giving each of them a blowjob, so it kinda did.
i forgot how loud opening a beer is in a house where your not allowed to drink
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