who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
I hope im prettier
yea, just so you know this whole self-loathing thing is getting pretty fucking annoying
We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
I was unaware that a tutu and pasties was appropriate attire to this
She told me she wanted to wax my ass. I'm terrified and oddly aroused.
So. Much. Sex. I feel like i ran a marathon then someone kicked me in the vagina. Soo worth it
Lightning struck the tree right outside of her window as I came inside her. I think its God's way of saying go by plan b.
I also turned off the Anchorman DVD start menu before cause I didn't want Will Ferrel watching me lose my virginity.
I've justified worse with less. I had sex with your brother because he was wearing a nice sweater
are you just inviting me because you can't afford an actual stripper?
Lemme put it this way babe, at point you were naked in Target.
Where were you?
Laughing
So you let the Viking explore your nether regions?
This is me trying to take a picture to send to grandma. At 4. We were trying to look sober.
You’re about to have a sober threesome with a rando at a Fenway bar?
I'm naked, eating straight Nutella, and listening to "Make you feel my love" on repeat. So no. He didn't ask me out.
Randomize
