Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
Not only is chick snoring like a 48 year old man but she's farting in rhythm
Just saw a maroon grand am stop on my street, the driver opened the door, vomited, and then drove away like nothing happened. Been there, done that.
they're mlb prospects.. of course i'm gonna bang one of them.
Lesbian sex in an alleyway drunk.
That just sounds like a recipe for sex in my backyard. Yes.
Dude you made a rodeo shot in beer pong won the game then got in the hot tub poured beer all over the side and screamed "hot tub time machine!"...
This hangover makes more sense now
When he came downstairs he looked at me like I was attempting to rob his house.
Did you reintroduce yourself?
He threatened to call the cops.
I did what any insensitive guy would do bought her friends shots and tried to fuck them
max decided it would be a good idea to run down the hall and smack down the exit sign. now we are sitting in the emergency room, and he is wearing the sign as a bracelet
One day we'll be rich enough to go to rehab. Until then, fuck it.
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
You just wait. When you see me foam roll naked, you're going to lose your mind.
its like probably shouldnt be sending pics of your asshole to strangers who work in the same building as you
My boss couldn’t find her phone so she asked me to call it and when I found it the screen said Fuck Toy was calling. I’m very much okay with this
Randomize
